The Thursday Afternoon Massacre

October 9, 2015


After much speculation, and devastating comments from his colleagues, the heir apparent is heir no longer. In what will henceforth be known as the briefest Speakership to be since the ignominious resignation of Congressman Bob Livingston, Majority Leader Kevin McCarthy has decided to forgo his candidacy. Naturally, this means that the race will be postponed until Barack Obama’s Mini-Me has found a suitable shill to thwart the goals of conservatives, i.e. the people who are responsible for the current Republican leadership being enthroned.

Of course, the people who brought you Marco Rubio and Jeb Bush are never short of terrible ideas, so keep your eyes on this space for future developments.


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